Good
morning to you, today is Friday, January 20, 2012, and I am your humble host,
the sultan of satire, the purveyor of non-pertinent information, the troublemaker
extraordinaire and I am coming to you recorded from the Eagle’s nest here at
wake up central with news you can’t use here on the TGI Friday edition of The
Morning Wake Up Call.
Let’s Go Cougars! –
Fox News, Todd Starns
A Utah school district
decided not to select a cougar as the mascot of a new high school partly
because school officials and some parents believed the word is disrespectful to
women.
Students in the
Canyons School District named the cougar their top choice to become the mascot
of the new Corner Canyon High School. The school is expected to open in 2013.
However, district
officials overrode the student vote after complaints that that the word
“cougar” is offensive and derogatory towards women.
“We heard from folks
who were worried about the connotation of the word ‘cougar’ as it pertains to
the current vernacular — in a derogatory manner,” Jennifer Toomer-Cook, a
spokesperson for the school district told Fox News & Commentary.
In pop culture, the
term “cougar” refers to a sexually aggressive middle-aged woman who attracts younger
men.
However, the cougar is
also a large mountain cat — that also happens to be the mascot for Brigham
Young University — along with three other Utah high schools.
Toomer-Cook said that
was the chief reason the district decided to override the students’ vote — even
though it was the highest vote-getter out of more than 1,000 suggestions.
Instead, school
officials decided to select the “Chargers” as the new mascot. Toomer-Cook said
they wanted to have a unique mascot name.
“Instead of going to a
place where people were seeing something potentially divisive, go to a mascot
that could more easily unify,” she said. “No other Utah school has Chargers as
its mascot. The board members were also saying this presents an image of
strength and captures a little bit of the area’s culture.”
Drunken Experiment –
The Blaze
Typically, employers discourage inebriation in the workplace.
But in this case, Florida law enforcement officials actually paid for employees to get drunk. The Florida
Department of Law Enforcement (the state’s version of the FBI) apparently
shelled out $330 on Jim Beam whiskey, booze and Doritos back in October.
Now, before you get too frustrated,
you should know that reports claim the fiesta was thrown in an effort to test
out the reliability of an alcohol breathalyzer machine (even with that
description some of you may still be frustrated — especially after you read the
read of the story). In sum, 15 employees attended the shindig to
test out the Intoxilyzer 8000, a tool that has come under fire as being
unreliable.
The group, which included crime
analysts, staff assistants and police officers consumed the alcohol, was
recorded as members blew into three of the units. Additionally, they had their
blood drawn and sent to a lab. The Herald Tribune:
The $8,000 study, put together in
three days, was part of a broader push to save the reputation of the embattled
Intoxilyzer 8000, FDLE records show. And in December, FDLE’s alcohol testing
guru Laura Barfield came to a Sarasota County courtroom for a hearing and
presented results of the drunken employee experiment to a panel of judges,
saying it proved the machines were accurate.
But the study might not even be worth
the $330 bar bill.
At the hearing, judges deciding the
fate of the machine in Sarasota and Manatee counties seemed skeptical of even
considering the study, in part because bloodwork was still at the lab and the
examination was not yet finalized.
McMouse in the McBuns! – Huffington Post
Karruim Demaio, a former McDonald's
employee, shot a cell phone video of a mouse trapped in a bag of Big Mac buns at a Philadelphia McDonald's. In the
video below, the frantic mouse tramples across many different buns. According
to the Demaio, the manager ordered the employees to serve the buns, and has
previously wiped off mouse droppings from buns and then served them. When Fox
29 asked the manager, she denied the claims.
"I was working there from October
of 2010 to January of this year. There hasn't been a time when we couldn't go
in the back and see mouse droppings on the bread," Demaio told Fox 29.
According to the Philadelphia Health
Department, this particular McDonald's is not in satisfactory compliance with health standards; the owner is
investigating the claims.
Legal Mumbo Jumbo
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